When people make you lose respect for them

Ok, Finally on Saturday December 14, I launched my second book Break The Alabaster and released a third one - Things I've Learnt.

Fantastic event though my some of my reviewers didn't show up and didn't have the courtesy to call me and explain why or even give me reasons why they chickened out.  It was to be an all male panel to review the book. Only one man - Usen Udoh - out of the four showed up.  Then I got three ladies to sit in the review panel and it was awesome.  Usen did a fantastic job being the only man in the panel. The Moderator - Sister Bisi was super! Audrey, Ireayo and Jeniffer made the difference.

I sat down there while the book review was going on and somehow my mind wandered back and forth and I began to write another book in my head.  I just wondered why some people do the things they do. What goes through their mind when they do those things and how they truly feel when they have done those things.

Things like being disrespectful.  Things like being late to an event.  Things like not showing up when they have promised to.  Things like leaving your work undone and expecting you to understand. Things like speaking ill behind your back. Things like snickering behind your back and smiling when you turn. Things like hiding, hoarding and coding information even when it is unnecessary. Things like lying. Things like half truths.  Things like competitive behaviour.  Things like acting all more holy and spiritual than Christ.  Things like ....... I don't even know sef.

Sometimes, we do not realise - and this has nothing to do with age - that it is easy for us to make others lose the tiny bit of respect they have for us when we behave in a certain way. I deliberately treat people with respect no matter who they are because my motto always is - no one knows tomorrow. I painfully admit that because people don't have respect as adults, they also bring up badly behaved and very disrespectful children.  Children who see you and look at you and wait for you to say - Hi dear, how are you? before they greet you.

I sat there thinking and as I stood up to speak my closing remarks, and I got to make some comments about not caring what anyone thought of me - I could see some people snickering and making faces at one another.  I smiled because they only did what I expected of them to do - be small minded as usual.

I stood there and though I was speaking, I concluded in my mind that I only require people to respect me and not love me. Love without respect can be fleeting but respect brings love that is lofty and lasting.

So I will keep my respect. I will be true to myself.  I will be true to my word. I will truly support the people I have said I will support.  I will treat people with respect even whe they do not deserve it and teach them to respect me. I will insist on being respected rather than loved because I will earn it. I will cut off people who disrepect me especially if they are just incapable of having respect for me or anyone.

I will not allow people to lose their respect for me. That I concluded as I finished speaking.